Joker Quotes

65+ Quotes From Batman’s Nemesis the Joker

One of the most iconic super-villains in the DC universe and in popular culture in general, he is primarily known for being the dark knight’s archenemy. A criminal mastermind with a sadistic sense of humor, he is recognizable by his extravagant style and a manic grin. As disturbing and bizarre as the following quotes might be, you will also find that they are thought-provoking.

Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside.

As you know, madness is like gravity…all it takes is a little push.

If you’re good at something, never do it for free.

Nobody panics when things go “according to plan”. Even if the plan is horrifying!

Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos…

What doesn’t kill you, simply makes you stranger!

Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Do you know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it! You know, I just… *do* things.

Tell your men they work for me now, this is my city!

It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a message. Everything burns!

Let’s put a smile on that face!

Those mob fools want you gone. So they can get back to the way things were. But I know the truth, there’s no going back. You’ve changed things…forever.

And I thought my jokes were bad.

The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules. And tonight, you’re gonna break your one rule.

Do you want to know why I use a knife? You see, guns are too quick. You can’t savor all of the little…emotions. In their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way…I knew your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?

Introduce a little anarchy, upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos, I’m an agent of chaos , and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair.

I don’t wanna kill you, what would I do without you? Go back to rippin’ off mob dealers… no, no, no… no you, you complete me.

You can’t rely on anyone these days, you gotta do everything yourself, don’t we? That’s ok, I came prepared, it’s a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, you know how I got these scars?

I took gotham’s white knight and I brought ‘im down to our level. Madness, as you know, is a lot like gravity, all it takes is a little push.

If the police expect to play against the Joker, they’d better be prepared to be dealt from the bottom of the deck !

Very neat! That ugly head of yours does have a brain!

One by One, they’ll hear my call. Then this wicked town, will follow my fall.

Madness is the emergency exit. You can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away… forever.

They could put me in a helicopter and fly me up into the air and line up the bodies head to toe on the ground in delightful geometric patterns like an endless June Taylor dance routine — and it would never be enough. No, I don’t keep count. But you do. And I love you for it.

April sweet is coming in, let the feast of fools begin!

Parting is such sweet sorrow, dearest. Still, you can’t say we didn’t show you a good time. Enjoy yourself out there… in the asylum. Just don’t forget — if it ever gets too tough… there’s always a place for you here.

And he didn’t die all at once. It was hours before the screaming stopped. I almost didn’t get to sleep that night. That was the last time I’d used crushed glass…

Live…and in person! The Caliph of Clowns, the Grand Mogul of Mountebanks, the One and Only JOKER! Prerecorded for this time zone.

The real joke is your stubborn, bone deep conviction that somehow, somewhere, all of this makes sense! That’s what cracks me up each time!

Haven’t you ever heard of the healing power of laughter?

I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman.

The pen, is truly mightier than the sword!

Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people, of the burden of your failed and useless lives. But, as my plastic surgeon always said: if you gotta go, go with a smile.

Now you fellas have said some pretty mean things. Some of which *were* true under that fiend, Boss Grissom. He *was* a thief, and a terrorist. On the other hand he had a tremendous singing voice. He’s dead now, and he’s left me in charge. Now, I can be theatrical, and maybe even a little rough – but one thing I am not, is a *killer*. I am an artist. I *love* a good party. So, truce. Commence au festival!

I now do what other people only dream. I make art until someone dies. See? I am the world’s first fully functioning homicidal artist.

As though we were made for each other… Beauty and the Beast. Of course, if anyone else calls you beast, I’ll rip their lungs out.

I’m of a mind to make some mookie.

See, this is how crazy Batman’s made Gotham! If you want order in Gotham, Batman must take off his mask and turn himself in. Oh, and every day he doesn’t, people will die, starting tonight. I’m a man of my word.

It’s a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?

They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out like a leper!

Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick.

It’s not about money, it’a about sending a message. Everything burns!

We stopped checking for monsters under our bed, when we realized they were inside us.

The only sensible way to live is without rules.

I’m different, f*ck your opinion.

I like you, but I want to kill you.

Does it depress you? To know just how alone you really are.

You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with. Nothing to do with all your strength.

Tell me something, my friend, have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

As my plastic surgeon always says; If you gotta go, go with a smile.

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